Friday, October 16, 2009


It is definitely fall in Southern Indiana: rainy and only 43 degrees, dark, gloomy skies, but IT IS FALL BREAK. Four days to be lazy, or not, to sleep-in or not, whatever, it is our choice. No bus duty, no meetings, no lunch duty, no parents, no kids, no teachers. Life is good. :-)
I'm not quite ready for such cool weather, but I love the chance to wear sweaters and jackets again. And since my office is a constant 58 degrees with winds out of the north, I have been choosing some bright, colorful new toppers for my basic black look. I find it amazing what a good cover-up can, well..cover! No one needs to know what chunkiness lies beneath my new bronze brocade jacket with tiny ruffled trim. Or that the little patchwork number is disguising 3 rolls of excess insulation. And the navy swing cardigan, oh my, how well it flows over all the extras and makes me look taller and leaner. We all know tall and lean aren't words usually used to describe me, but this navy job is almost a miracle worker. If only it came in other colors. I even bought some new jean trousers, dark indigo, long, lean legs which transform my fat little stubs into legs to my chin. I am so happy with my new things or with the cataract on my right eye which is distorting my vision enough for me to think I'm seeing all these things... yeah, I guess it is the cataract, girls. I'll still be the same ole' dumpy goose when we get together in Indy in a few weeks. No surprises.
My mom is on meds now for the memory loss, she has good days and bad. Depression has been a big issue lately, for the first time in her 80 years, she doesn't have anyone to serve. My nieces have gone to school and aren't there much. Mom has had these girls since birth al days everyday, while their parents work. My brother and his wife would eat at her house many nights when they came to pick up the girls. And now she doesn't have anything to do, to look forward to and she's sad. My sister spends several hours each day with her and I do weekends, but it isn't the same for her. Mom is the oldest of 13 kids and started caring for her younger sibs as a toddler. She babied my dad and us kids, waited on us hand and foot, until we married and beyond. Her life has changed and for her this means it is over. She just doesn't know how to relax and enjoy life. It breaks my heart. I pray you all will never know this for your parents, it is such a feeling of loss. Right, Jill? They are here, but not here, with you, but not really. Loosing my dad was much easier than watching Mom go through this.
I have my annual laryngitis again. No voice and coughing fits every few minutes. Fun, Fun. No fever, just no talkee :-). Fall allergies in the Ohio River Valley, I guess.
I hope everyone is doing great, no snow storms yet, no impossible school issues, no family emergencies. I can't wait to sit down with you all and catch up. After a few days of wallowing in self-pity, I've put away my violin and face each day anew and make the best of it. I do everything I'm capable of to make our school a safe environment for our kids and leave it in my office at night. I always find it waiting the next morning, no one has solved the problems, but at least I didn't take them home to Stephen King. I wasn't being fair to him or myself. Every once in a while I have to see I'm not in control, we all answer to God and He has the Plan. Not me. Rather humbling sometimes.
Courtney is coming home on the 24th for a few weeks, yay! Be wonderful to see her again. The computer has helped with emails, Facebook and Skype, but I need to see and touch my daughter again. At least for awhile.
I'm planning to take my girlies to B-ton for an overnight on Sunday. They have plans for tonight and tomorrow, so they won't be free til after church, but we can go shopping and they can swim. Even Caleb is going, I think. He says he is on Fall break, too and wants to go swimming. Pray for me and my chicklets!
Love to all. Talk to me. Hedy

Saturday, October 3, 2009


Hello Everyone,
Saturday night, my kiddos just left and I'm tired. I didn't think I would get through this past week alive. The weather change has everyone wired, we are doing Aquity Testing, and it is Pumpkin Festival week in the Valley. Chaos rules the land and all young brains turn to mush. I do believe this place could qualify as a research habitat if some enterprising university would look closely. Suddenly an 8th grade Honors Student finds fractions much too difficult to comprehend. A 6th grader challenges ME to a duel. And sadly, a bright, beautiful girl decides to quit eating. My heart breaks and I'm laughing my head off during the same lunch period. Do I look like I can DUEL? And why oh why are bright, beautiful girls in such need to control something in their lives? What is going on that they can't just be young and carefree and healthy? A former student showed up at the end of the day and cried that her babies were taken from her. ..and her husband just got out of jail. ..and she's just been released from rehab... and she has no money and no where to live...can I help her? The last time we saw each other, I gave her $500 to take her babies and go to her mother's up north. She bought pills instead, got busted and lost her kids. Oh, yes, she's pregnant again. Looking at her, I see my last 20 years go up in smoke. Why did I think I could help anyone? The world is way too big and bad to defeat.
Jill, you are right, we can't do this anymore. Let's retire and run away.

The other side of the coin is my family, my friends, my co-workers and most of the kids in my school. I love them for being normal and gentle and supportive and sweet and non-threatening and excited about life and the future. I am so blessed to have everyone of you in my life. Sometimes I get overwhelmed by the others. I'm sorry I let that happen.

Our weather is turning cool and the sky is absolutely magnificent at times. The clear blue is contrasted by the bright white of big, puffy clouds floating through it. The trees are just beginning to turn; each day brings more color. The humidity which seems to blur the air for the entire summer has gone, leaving a clarity that was forgotten. Everyone is struck by it, no one seems to remember it being this bright, this clear last year or ever before. I recall hearing this every fall of my life. It makes me happy that people still notice small things like the weather. We aren't quite so caught up in the rat race that we aren't aware of God's blessings...yet.
I've always felt safe and sheltered in our hills of Southern Indiana. How can the flats of your Northlands offer protection from Nature itself? I suppose the trade off is wide open spaces for hillls and hollows. I wonder if I could have survived in Kansas or Nebraska where the Plains roll on for days without a break in the horizon. I think not. I find comfort in small rooms, small houses, small towns.
I am so excited that most of us are planning to be in Indy on the 13th. Angela, I hope it will work out for you to be with us. Staci, Carrie how about you? I can get a third room, no problem.
Courtney is coming home for a visit on the 24th, we pick her up in Chicago. I hope she stays till after Thanksgiving, but don't know her plans yet. My niece, Stori, adopted 2 Congolese boys and they will be here Nov. 7. Courtney will stay with Stori and her family to help with them for a week or two, I'm sure. They are 6 and 16 months old, Jamey and Stori have an 8 year old boy and a 10 year old daughter. We all are over the moon over getting these babies home. What a wonderful, selfless thing for this family to do. We are so proud of them.
Our family is well, no N1H1, just coughs and sniffles. The boys are growing like weeds and are beautiful. Maddie is as long legged and thin as a colt, doing real well in 4th grade. Mackenzie was inducted into National Honor Society last Sunday in a beautifully quiet ceremony. We were excited and proud that she made it in as a sophomore. Shayla is sporting a new hair style today. Clipped short and spikey, very edgy. She looks much more her age than usual. She will be 21 in December. Such a sweet heart, I worry about her future when Nina and Trent are gone.
Thank you, my girls for letting me bend your ears tonight. I needed to talk. Looking forward to tomorrow. Stephen King and I may go for a long drive. Good night, Gaggle.